How You’re Scaring Off Good Men Without Even Knowing It (And How to Attract Them Instead)

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Not too long ago a friend of mine was hunting for a wife. (Yes, men do this!) He was in his mid-thirties, was avidly growing his very successful business, and was ready to meet the future mother of his children so that he could begin building a life with her.

This man is a King.
He is handsome, kind, wickedly intellectual, funny, adventurous, courteous, romantic, successful, spiritually-driven, big-hearted, emotionally-intelligent, and has a sexy Australian accent to boot! 

He went on plenty of dates with awesome women but each time he would come back disappointed. 

He said that when he asked them what they were looking for they tended to be very nonchalant and uninvested, saying things like “Well I’d like a relationship but honestly I don’t need one. I’m pretty happy on my own.” 

To which he would say to me, “Well then what does she need me for?” 

A man who is clear on the fact that he wants to be in relationship is going to gravitate more towards a woman who is also clear on her desire for relationship.

Listen, I get it. Everyone says that love finds you when you’re not looking for it. 
When the truth of the matter is that it’s not because you’re not looking for it that it finds you.
It’s because nine times out of ten you’re investing heavily in yourself, in your growth, and in living your best life and that is attractive as fuck.

But this seemingly innocuous little saying is doing more harm than good. 
It is encouraging women NOT to own their desire. 
It’s also encouraging them to believe that they are desperate or wrong for having that desire so much in the first place.
When the truth is that your desire is precious and sacred to the life you want to live.

It is far more brave to choose vulnerability and have your desire’s back than it is to pretend you don’t want something you don’t want because you are unconsciously protecting yourself from the raw, beautiful truth of your inner most yearning.

Do you like it when a man acts like he doesn’t care about having a relationship or not? 
Are you attracted and intrigued when he is wishy-washy about what he looking for?
Does that engender excitement, trust, and admiration from you?
No. I didn’t think so.

So why would it magnetize a self-loving, powerful, love-seeking man towards you?

A King is going to look for how he fits into your life. Is there room for him to add his power, brilliance, and genius and contribute to the electricity and juiciness of your experience? 
If you have no room for a King, then he will NATURALLY move on to a Queen who does.

This is not a negative judgement of you. This is the simple mechanics of alignment.

If you are not owning your desire fully and OUT LOUD. 
Then you are not in alignment with it. 
Plain and simple.

For men, being uniquely useful to their women, is a precious experience. 
It is one that gives them great satisfaction and fulfillment. 
And if you’re being honest with yourself, wouldn’t you love to have someone you could rely on and relax into?
Yeah! Me too! (It’s freaking AWESOME!)

So let yourself need him. 
For all the RIGHT reasons.

I don’t need Joshua to be happy, healthy, successful, or fulfilled. 
But I do need him. 
I need him to experience the intimacy that is unique between two people. 
To be touched by a man. Held by a man. To share life’s joys and pitfalls with. And so much more.

There is a SACRED reason you crave a deep, devotional epic love. 
It is not foolish or naive.
It is splendid.
As human beings we are wired for relationship, so give yourself permission to lean in and choose one that ignites your whole life!

Dig in and excavate. 
What is it that you really TRULY want?

And do it for you!
Don’t do it because it makes you more attractive (although it does!).
Do it because you are practicing loving yourself so fiercely that you no longer deny yourself the desires inherent to your soul signature.
Do it because the Queen inside you KNOWS that standing for what she wants and honoring her truth is who she must be and become to align with the sovereign love she is craving.
Do it because you are so fucking worthy of it!
Do it because we have one life to live and if you’re honest with yourself, you want a delicious epic man by your side!

Your man is alive out there. 
On the planet. 
Living his life.
Think about that!!!!!

So beam your bat-signal girlfriend!
Once you light it up, it’s only a matter of time!

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If you want more guidance on how to begin this process you can download my Rewild Your Heart Workbook which is designed to help you unearth your authentic desire! 

AND/OR you can book a Love Breakthrough Call where we will get clear on your divine desires, obliterate any self-sabotaging blind spots that are getting in your way, and come up with some strategies to get you on track to attract your Soul King. All in as little as 45 minutes! 

Theora Moench